Today's word of the day, Vocabulovers, is “zaftig.” (Vocabulovers: people who love vocabulary.) Actually, according to Merriam-Webster.com, it was the word of the day for May 19, 2005. But we shall not quibble. (Quibble: a fruity frozen drink sold at Friendly's. Or is that the Fribble? Fine, we shall not fribble.)

Zaftig comes from the Yiddish word, “zaftik.” (Zaftik: the Yiddish form of “zaftig.”) When I saw it, I knew it was a word to seize, cherish, and use in this column. Not that I speak Yiddish. My progenitors (Progenitors: parents of mine who are dead.) were about as non-Jewish is it is possible to be without being Palestinian. (Palestinian: a person who does not derive from Great Britain , as all my progenitors did.)

No, I knew it was a word for me – a juicy word to sink my teeth into. Into which to sink one's teeth. Anyway, a juicy word. Which, as it turns out, fits the meanings: 1. Having a full, round figure; pleasingly plump. 2. Juicy or succulent, derived from "zaft," meaning "juice" or "sap."

So zaftig is a succulent word used to describe succulent women. (Succulent: finger-lickin' good.) Say it over and over again: zaftig. Zaftig. Zaftig. It makes me think of the word “zeppelin.” (Zeppelin: a big hot inflatable thing.) A big hot juicy inflatable woman! Whoa! Wahoo! Who wouldn't want to date one? Not me, personally, but if I were a studmuffin of a guy, that's what I'd be looking for. You bet. (Studmuffin: a man so irresistibly attractive that his allure can only be compared to that of bakery goods.)

Alas, like the zeppelin, the zaftig woman has fallen from style. With the Hindenburg, the zaftig beauties of days gone by have gone up in flames, replaced by scrawny girl models whom we suspect are actually pre-adolescent boys. (Adolescence: the phase of child development where offspring grow surly and dumb, and stay that way until you can legally evict them.)

In the 1930s, when “zaftig” entered the vernacular, “Rubenesque” meant “gorgeously buxom,” not “jumbo-sized and made of mayonnaise.” (Rubenesque: painted by Peter Paul Rubens, a famous artist who owned a deli on the side and invented a popular corned-beef and sauerkraut sandwich. He painted nudie pictures of lady customers who loved his sandwich.)

Now, Vocabulovers, the time has come to assimilate all we've learned today and put it to practical use by combining all our new words into a sentence. (Sentence: punishment imposed by a judge, or something that ends with a period, such as a month.) The words are: quibble, zaftik/g, progenitors, Palestinian, succulent, zeppelin, studmuffin, adolescence, and Rubenesque. Here goes:

“Let's not quibble,” breathed Mohammed, the Palestinian studmuffin, into my ear, “over whether you're zaftig or Rubenesque. Even if your progenitors are infidels, you must come away with me in my zeppelin, because I've dreamed of a succulent woman like you since my adolescence.”

I needed two sentences. Can you do better? Email me. Bonus points if you can incorporate “Vocabulover” and “sentence.”

© 2005, Julianna Berry.